The growth of stepfamilies and the existence of subsequent conflictual rights and duties has provoked lively debate in the juridical field, so that reflection of the meaning of the words "family" and "parent" is called for. To identify the family system to which children in stepfamilies belong, both the newly created family unit and the systems with which it - custodial parent’s new partner, children from previous unions, biological parents - should be looked at. Stepchildren may feel they belong to different families and strong emotional bonds may be build up with the non-custodial parent. Very few studies on the relationships between stepparents and stepchildren, family dynamics and parental roles, have been carried out in Italy. All of these considerations have to be assessed in drawing up a juridical definition of this family structure.
A research study was conducted in eight primary schools in Turin, Moncalieri, and Nichelino (Italy) has been during the academic year 1997/1998 to conduct a deeper investigation on children living in stepfamilies.
The documentation (graphic tests, a text on emotional reactions, texts conducted at school) and the findings on a sample of 30 cases have been collected thanks to the co-operation of the teachers.
· DRAWING TESTS:
- Drawing of the Family (assignment: Draw your family)
- Drawing of the classroom (assignment: Draw your classroom, draw it as you would like to be)
These tests were performed during class time by all the students in the classes from which the samples were drawn.
- Title: "The people you feel closest to".
During the meeting the teachers agreed to my request of using a tape-recorder.
The aims of the meeting were to gain greater konwledges in the following fields:
* Family history and structure
* Behavioural problems at school or in the family
* Stories related by students to the teachers about family experiences
* Relationships with school, new family and non-custodial parent
The sample was made up of 14 males and 16 females between the ages of six and ten. In 27 cases separation occurred in pre-school age, in one case the child was 6 and a half years old, and in two cases the children were eight. In almost all cases the custody of the children was awarded to the mother after separation, but in one case the father gained custody and there is one case of joint custody.
The level of visitation to the non-custodial father varies from very frequent (weekly/fortnight), to very limited, restricted to vacation time, or to totally absent. In 20 cases, only the custodial parent has rebuilt a new family while in 10 cases both the parents are living with new partners. In 6 cases the custodial parent remarried, whilein 18 cases there is a cohabitation situation. In 6 cases the new parent has maintained his own residence even if he/she participates actively to the daily life of the new family both during the week and at weekends, sometimes even spending the night in the house of the children and their custodial parent.
The family structure of most of the sample is fairly simple. Fourteen of them are only children or have only biological siblings; six live with step-brothers/sisters (either children of the new partner of the custodial parent or children born to the new union); five live with both the biological and the step-brothers/sisters.
The period of time spent with the rebuilt family ranges from six months to six years.
Data analysis
- The family from the child’s point of view
- The stepparent
- Non-custodial parent’s partner
- Step brothers/sisters
- Psychological environment
The child undergoes an adaptation phase before being integrated into the new family. This study underlines that the age of the child when the family is rebuilt exerts a significant influence on the child’s psychological make-up. The drawing sometimes reveal that the child tends to under-evaluate himself within the family (original or rebuilt) and/or lack of emotional relationship between the child and the new couple. In addition, the custodial parent is not always drawn as a significant figure; in the text he/she is not described as a person to whom the child feels emotionally attached and in the illustration this parent does not always feature as an important figure from an affective/emotional point of view.
Some difficulties in the school results and in the emotional area also emerge. According to teachers 2/3 of the sample under-performed lower with respect their capabilities at certain times. Most of them paid little attention to the lessons and experience difficulties in concentration. Eighteen of the children have problems in relating to their school friends; they either become isolated or more frequently, build up an exclusive relation with some contemporaries.
Fig. n. 3 - Drawing of the Family
Even where the child lives in wider and more complex family system, he she remains attached to a simpler triangular family structure, where the reference figures often remain the biological parents (Figure 3). This occurs most often when level of visitation to the non-custodial parent remains frequent enough to allow for continuity of the relationship between the two. In other cases, the reference figures are the custodial parent and the new partner (Figure 19).
Fig. n. 19 - Drawing of the Family
In figure n.2 we can see how a child might experience a sense of belonging to both the family units rebuilt by biological parents,however the child does not includes adults of the two families in the same drawing. On just one occasion were both the natural father and the stepfather included in the same drawing (Figure 13). However, this was a special case since the natural father had died six months prior the cohabitation of the mother with her new partner (one year before the test). In this case intervention between the variables can justify the presence of the both males.
Fig. n. 2 - Drawing of the Family
Fig. n. 13 - Drawing of the Family
The research revealed a sense of integration among the stepchildren. The sample analysed included stepparent’s children as well as children born from the new union in their drawings. One child (Figure 25) also included the daughter of his mother’s new partner who does not live with them. The terms used in the text to refer to the stepbrothers/sisters and to children born from the new union are the same as those used for the biological siblings.
Fig. n.25 - Drawing of the Family
Variables considered in Table 1 are stongly influenced by the level of visitation to the non-custodial father. Contact with the non-custodial parent exerts a considerable influence on whether the stepfather is included in the group of people with close emotional bond to the child, as well as on the relationsship with the stepparent described in the text. In fact children from the sample who have no contact with the non-custodial parent described their stepparent and even used expressions which would suggest a emotional relationship between the two. Thus it would seem that the stepfather assumes the role of the parental figure; the child identifies himself with the stepfather and when the level of visitation to non custodial father is low, limited to vacation period, or non-existent, then an emotional relationship is build up.
Tab. 1 Significance level of relation between variables
INCLUSION STEPPARENT IN DRAW. FAMILY |
EVALUATION STEPPARENT IN DRAW. FAMILY |
INCLUSION STEPPARENT IN THE TEXT |
EMOTIONAL CLOSENESS WITH STEPPARENT EXPRESSED IN THE TEXT |
NAME TO REFER TO STEPPARENT |
|
LEVEL OF VISITATION |
.001 |
.02 |
.02 |
.01 |
.02 |
The terminology used (Tab.2) would suggest that the stepparent assumes a variety of roles in the relationship with the child depending on the age of the child at the time of the formation of the new family with the custodial parent and role played by the non-custodial parent.
Tab. 2 Terminiology used by children to refer to resident stepparent
Daddy |
13 |
Daddy + first name or adjective |
4 |
First name |
9 |
Mummy’s friend |
4 |
The child endow the stepparent with a parental role similar to that of the non-custodial biological parent; a surrogate parental role in the absence of conctat with the biological parent, or the parent’s new partner may simply remain "mummy’s friend", especially when he/she maintains his/her own residence.
The level of visitation to the non-custodial parent has a powerful influence on the choice of terminology(.02). It is very easy for children who have no contact with their biological non-custodial parent to start calling the stepfather "daddy", when the frequency of visitation is weekly or fortnigthly the children need to distinguish the two figures, using the stepfather’s first name as well as the word "daddy" or they use an expression such as "my new daddy".
The age of the children when the new family is formed also play an important part in the choice of terminology used (.20).
Tab. 3 Significance level of relation between variables
CHILD AGE |
LEVEL of VISITATION |
|
NAME TO REFER TO STEPPARENT |
.20 |
.02 |
The term the child uses to describe the stepparent is not linked to the weight attribute to this figure in the drawing of his family. Use of the word "daddy" rather than merely the first name does not necessarily imply a different bond between child and stepfather. Use of such a term might have closer association to the role perceived by the child in the family unit rather than the actual bond between child and stepparent.
Another variable to be taken into account is the time spent by the child in the newly formed family. Even if this is considerably less than time spent visiting the other biological non resident parent (.01) it influences the level of emotional closeness expressed in the text (sig. level 0.20). However it exerts no influece on inclusion in the drawing. Therefore it might be concluded that when some conctat is maintened with non residential parent, the child continues to see this figure as a refernce parent, even when the emotional attachment between chid and stepparent increases over time.
GULOTTA G., Le famiglie riorganizzate, in Bal Filoramo L. (a cura di), I tempi della crescita tra identità e appartenenza, atti seminario, Govone, Torino, Celid, 1997
OLIVERO FERRARIS A., Il terzo genitore, Milano, Raffaello Cortina, 1997
ROBINSON M., SMITH D., Step by step: Focus on Stepfamilies, London, Harvester Wheatsheaf, 1993